This will be a little “chatty” so please bear with me.
It took me a couple days, but I have found myself back on track.
It helped to speak with my oncologist today. Dr. Attwell said that I barely qualified for HER2 positive status and he feels that herceptin can only help in my overall battle. He also said that my response to chemo is excellent.
Today he had a family practitioner in with him – Cancer Clinic also offers teaching. As Dr. Attwell told her a synopsis of my condition, he added at the end that I continue to work after 4 chemo treatments. The look on her face was priceless. I, on the other hand, am honestly confused about people’s response to my working while undergoing treatment. I promise, I’m capable. And on the days I’m not, I WON’T work.
In filling out the paperwork for my long term disability plan application he calls me “motivated”, I asked him if he wanted to put down “stubborn”, I was told “too late”.
Another funny was the examination of my breasts – here Dr. Attwell is on one side feeling the breast, the other doctor on the other side feeling the breast and then they switched. He asked her for her observations and then could discuss right/wrong or what was missed. I suppose I should feel like a maniquin, I just found it humorous.
Apparently, by the way, he presented my condition at a breast cancer conference he attended in September, but I don’t know details beyond that – and the only reason I know this is that I have obtained a copy of my file up to October 16th.
My endocrinologist appointment yesterday went very well also. Dr. Miller tried to hang himself with his own tie when I revealed that my dosage of dexamethasone (steriod and anti-nausea drug that spikes my blood sugars) goes up with the new chemo regiment. Actually, the funny part began even before this. On Monday I faxed my blood glucose readings to his office as I usually do weekly and asked on the summary page if it was necessary that I even come in for an appointment considering we usually speak every week. So when I arrive at the office, Dr. Miller gave me grief about not wanting to see him!! Worth the laugh.
I’m still scared. I know that HER2 is not the best news. Hell, IBC is not the best news. But I’m confident because my oncologist keeps saying “treating with curative intent” and I’ve learned he doesn’t say what isn’t true. Is it blind faith? I can’t say with any certainty, but I don’t think so.