more waiting

I’m still processing my frank and somewhat reassuring discussion with the GP.

So, what did the doctor say? This is a very short version. As I mentioned, I’m still processing. It needs to ruminate a long while. The truth is, she’s not all that willing to let Dr. Taylor off the hook, and by that I mean she wants to send a letter to him plus request my endocrinologist do the same to present all the facts to him — including her own opinion that something needs to be done for comfort and even my self-esteem. She thinks he didn’t have enough information. Once again I heard how absolutely amazing this guy is. BUT, and she was firm about this, she truly believes that if my discomfort remains, then yes, a referral will be in order. She stressed that she’s in my corner. So, I’m willing to let this part go forward. I would rather he get his hand slapped by fellow physicians than by me.  In January, we’ll revisit this.

I’m resigned to this not being a quick process. And I’m determined to do what I’m comfortable with. That the surgery options are covered means I just need to feel comfortable with the surgeon. I’ve had a long time to think about this and get over my initial hurt. Well, it doesn’t hurt so much as I can’t forget. I’m willing to let her guide me…but only so far.

Here’s the thing: he’s the best. Truly. People come from all over B.C. to see him. So why wouldn’t I want the best to make me feel more comfortable and self-confident? It’s not like I haven’t seen brilliant assholes before – mom’s oncologist was one, but he did a good job at least on the medical side if not the bedside manner.

namaste