For the very first time, work was not what it was supposed to be and it collided with my cancer battle.
The only reason I have continued to work through all of this, besides being able to, has been the need to have something to keep my mind occupied so that I don’t fall into a depression and hinder my own fight.
Today, work became more stressful than my cancer. It was just a situation that got blown out of proportion and caused some angst in the process of finding a resolution. [Edited 22 Jan – I’ve deleted the previous explanation because I don’t want people to make assumptions (too late, I know, but it’s not what you thought) and I am not about to reveal the details.]
I toyed with the idea of just beginning full sick leave now as opposed to when I have surgery, but there were good reasons against doing just that. 1) It was knee-jerk. 2) What would I be thinking or doing next week? 3) Wouldn’t that be giving into the situation and possibly feeding someone’s wishes?
So, I cried and then I did what I had to do to ensure no repeat and I went on with my day.
I know what you’re thinking. Trust me, I will take care of me FIRST if work does interfere with my mental and emotional health again.